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Forum moderator: B1gch0pper, Ryan  
Forum » General » Comedy Central » HAVING A BAD DAY? (Just remember, it could be worse.....)
HAVING A BAD DAY?
B1gch0pperDate: Monday, 2010-08-09, 7:00 PM | Message # 1
Alien Racer
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The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez oil spill
in Alaska was $8,000. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively
saved animals were released back into the wild amid cheers
and applause from onlookers. A minute later, in full view, a killer
whale ate them both.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A psychology student in New York rented out her spare room to a carpenter in
order to nag him constantly and study his reactions. After weeks of
needling, he snapped and beat her with an axe leaving her
mentally retarded.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen, shaking frantically
with what looked like a wire running from his waist towards the electric
kettle. Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current she whacked him
with a handy plank of wood by the back door, breaking
his arm in two places. Until that moment he had been happily listening to
his Walkman.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two animal rights protesters were protesting at the cruelty of sending pigs
to a slaughterhouse in Bonn Germany. Suddenly the pigs, all two thousand of
them, escaped through a broken fence and stampeded, trampling the two
hapless protesters to death.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Iraqi terrorist, Khay Rahnajet, didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb.
It came back with "return to sender" stamped on it. Forgetting it was the
bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits.

Your day's not so bad, is it?

------------------------------------------------------------------------

And finally.......

In a hospital ' s Intensive Care Unit, patients always died in
the same bed, on Sunday morning, at about 11:00 a.m.,
regardless of their medical condition.

This puzzled the doctors and some even thought it had
something to do with the supernatural. No one could solve the
mystery as to why the deaths occurred around 11:00 a.m. on
Sunday, so a worldwide team of experts was assembled to
investigate the cause of the incidents.

The next Sunday morning, a few minutes before 11:00 a.m., all
of the doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to
see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about.
Some were holding wooden crossses, prayer books, and other holy
objects to ward off the evil spirits.

Just when the clock struck 11:00, Pookie Johnson, the part-time
Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and unplugged the life support
system so he could use the vacuum cleaner.

D'OH!


Team Member
 
SinDate: Monday, 2010-08-09, 9:13 PM | Message # 2
Alien Racer
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HAHAHA the final 2 made me LOL , and the name "Pookie Johnson" made me laugh even more lol

Team Member
 
Forum » General » Comedy Central » HAVING A BAD DAY? (Just remember, it could be worse.....)
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